Some follow up

I'm not sure what to say here but I figured you may be wondering what has happened in this past week.
Well, she read my letter and we talked. Yes, emotions were high, but she didn't just go on the defensive like I thought she would. It was a good start to be heard for a change, or at least it felt like it. We discussed some of the things that I was concerned about and she agreed with me on almost everything I wrote with the exception of feeling like "room mates".

She wanted to know why I was talking to her less again. I said, why should I bother when you don't seem to listen to me and you especially don't take me seriously when I bring up the subject of sex.  She says that she knew it was important but never acted like it was.

How was I supposed to feel when she was always saying how tired she was, and yet, she would go use the treadmill for an hour, or could stay up in bed to read a book or watch a movie but was not interested in having sex? Guess she wasn't that tired after all. How was I not supposed to feel slighted by this? Was I not supposed to feel unwanted or unattractive? How could I not?

That brought up the "its not you, its me" excuse. She just figured no big deal. She said that she did know sex was important to me but just didn't prioritize it in her head. She always thought she could just push it off till tomorrow, until it always started snowballing, and all the tomorrows turned into weeks.

She asked me if I would divorce her over this, and I told her yes. I think that really drove the point home on how serious I was and how unhappy I've been.

We have been talking more about everyday things and there has been some more sex, but things still seem off. I can't put my finger on it yet, but I know it's going to take an ongoing effort.

On the same note, I also told her that I don't want sex to seem like a chore, or something she has to feel obligated to do, because when it is, its no good for either of us. There have been those moments as well, and I'll tell you that there is nothing worse than sex with a partner that seems preoccupied. I don't like it at all, I don't know who would. I want to know a woman enjoys my company, whether it be moans, screams, or even soft touches, something is always better than nothing.