Flesh Fiction

It started like any other day, the commute, lots of traffic, and the ever incessant inching closer to the daily grind. It can only get better from here, right? Well , if I only knew what the day had in store.

It was an innocent enough request, could I help her move a table to her apartment, we could do during lunch break. You get used to these kind of request when you own a truck. So its about twelve thirty when she says "you ready". Sure, lets go. We load the table in the truck and head out, her apartment is only about ten minutes away. The whole ride there I can't stop glancing at her legs tightly wrapped in the black dress pants, and the exposed flesh peaking above when her shirt rides slightly up her back.

We get to her place and I unload the table and follow her to the second floor apartment. We move the table into place and she loves it, "perfect fit" she says. She pulls half of a blunt out of the ashtray and lights it as she starts to pick up some stuff around the apartment. She proceeds into the bedroom which is directly across from me sitting there in the couch, I can't stop staring at that incredible body. I get up and cross the room to her while we are talking and ask if she minds sharing some of that blunt. We continue talking while I get a good look around the inner sanctum, the cloths piled everywhere, I can't help noticing the thongs haphazardly spread over a basket. We head back to the living room and sit down couch to finish the blunt. Then things got interesting.

She looks me directly in the eyes and says "you think I don't notice the way you look at me, with such intensity, how quickly you try to look away when I catch you?" There's seduction in those brown orbs and I'm being drawn in mercilessly as our faces get closer. Our lips meet and part as our tongues explore each others mouths, I can't help but be overwhelmed by my senses, her smell, the warmth of her body against mine, her hand slowing making is way up my inner thigh. The sensory overload along with the anticipation has my heart pounding in my chest, I'm already straining against my pants for release. My arms envelop her, pulling her against me just as her hand encloses me through my pants and feels how excited she has me. She says "I've wanted you for the longest time" as she is unbuckling my belt.

In no time she has my dick in her hands as she moves to the floor, I reluctantly remove my own exploring hands from her. On her knees she removes my pants completely as her head makes its way to me, she just puts the head of my dick in her mouth and looks up with those charcoal rimmed brown eyes, the sight is just so hot that I'm shaking with the anticipation of what is to come. She keeps those eyes on me as she continues to take the rest of me into her mouth, working slowly at first, using both her hands like I've only seen in movies. She is moaning ever so slightly, I'm surprised I can even hear it the way my heart is pounding in my chest, but I can certainly feel it. Its such a euphoric feeling that I don't want to end but I want her.


I tell her to stand up in front of me, my hand on her hips moving her shirt up over her head, exposing a beautiful set of tits just dying to be released from that red satin bra. I'm more than happy to oblige. I have both tits in my hand as I slowly start licking and sucking, she starts moaning in pleasure again. I move my hand to the waist band of her pants, pulling them off to reveal the matching red thong, never taking my mouth of her chest. I must be hard as steel, I so turned on. My hands run over that alabaster skin, over the ass I been eying for so long. I can't take it any more, I have to see if she is as turned on as me. I rub her pussy through the thin fabric and her moans get stronger, with one pull that thong hits the floor. My finger slides into her with barely any resistance, shes so wet. I still can't believe this is happening.

She pushes me back onto the couch and puts a leg on either side of me, rubbing my cock against her now wet entrance. In one shot she has me buried to the hilt. She feels so incredible, I'm quite impressed I did not blow it because I've wanted this for so long. I cup her ass, controlling the speed, I just want to so enjoy this. We start kissing again, our tempo matched only by our beating chest. She starts riding me really hard, next thing I know she says shes cumming, her whole body convulsing in pleasure. I can't help but smile knowing I helped cause that.

When she has settled down, I tell her to get on her hands and knees on the couch. She know exactly what to do, one hand on the back of the couch the other on her own ass looking back at me. She says, "I want you to fuck me". I guide my still throbbing cock into her hot pussy. Its so fucking sexy the way she keeps looking back at me over her shoulder, the lustful look on her face. I love seeing that tramp stamp above my cock sliding in and our of her. She says to me again "come on, fuck me harder", I'm more than happy to. I can't take much more, the sensory overload, with the final thrust I shoot my load deep inside her.

My mind is still reeling over what has just happened, I can't believe it. I'm waiting to wake up, for this to be some kind of cruel joke. It's not. She slowly moves forward releasing me from that magical box. We are both in shock, neither one of us saying anything for a minute. We have to get back to work, we put ourselves back together and jump back into the truck and head back. I just turned to her and sad "wow". She give me a knowing smile and says "there's more where that came from."

"The deception you chose is you own parasite"

Those who know me always say that I don't show any emotion, if they only knew the tempest raging inside me. Men are supposed to be rocks, right, unreadable and stoic. But there really is so much more beneath the surface, not everyone is as they seem. Sometimes it gets so hard to hold everything in, and I only do so because usually when I do try to get things out in the open, its not always to the desired effect. I must say that blogging has been a great outlet, its nice to be able to share and not be judged. Everyone who has left comments has been positive and supportive, and it is greatly appreciated.

Lately there is so much inner turmoil, anger, hate, love, jealousy, longing, desire, passion, frustration, compassion. Its eating me up inside, swinging from one extreme to the other. I just don't know where to direct it most times, I think that is why I've been trying to redirect it into other activities, trying to keep my mind from imploding. Those diversions are not working like they used to, that raging tempest just keep churning.

Minx

You wicked little minx...

How ironic that after reading a fellow bloggers post about using sexuality, that I should happen upon this past Fridays experience. The object of my desires decides she is going to change at work before leaving (we do have a loose dress code of black pants and polo or company related shirt), though I'm pretty sure she was going home anyway. She comes back into the department wearing a form fitting tank top and the tightest fucking jeans I have ever seen on a woman. Of course there is also the yellow bra that goes with the matching thong ever so slightly sticking above the top of that fine ass. I'm actually dumb struck at how hot she looks like this and am speechless for at least thirty seconds while trying to compose myself. There are only about 5-10 minutes left in the day, but boy did she make the most of them. I really do think this was intentional, she was walking around showing of the assets and at one point is bending over in front of me saying something, for the life of me I don't know what, all I was doing is taking in the great view down her shirt.

How am I not supposed to look, never mind try not to stare. She must know the kind of effect she has on guys when she does this, or am I being naive. Is she just fucking with my head, she knows I think she is attractive, but I don't think she has any idea how bad I want to fuck her. This is not helping matters in the least.

May I also add that this comes on the heals of her telling me she has a fuck buddy. I'm SO jealous of this lucky SOB. Maybe I should not be so jealous because she also said all she does is watch the clock during the apparent non event, guess she picked the wrong FB. The closer we get to each other, the more she makes me want her.

Needless to say its been a mind bending weekend in my head. My will is being tested to its limits. I'm sure there will be more to follow.

"Sitting in the dark I can't forget, even now I realize the time we'll never get, another story of the pinnacles of fate."

The struggle within

There is so much talk about infidelity and cheating on ones significant other and the ramifications involved, just wanted to add my own thoughts on the subject. To start, it seems that a lot of men and women are looking for the same thing, that which they are not getting at home, and its not just sex, its that feeling of intimacy, that connection on a base level that words don't do justice. We have obviously had this to begin with or we would not be having this discussion. But somehow the intimacy and passion evolves into living life for the daily grind, we become so accustomed to the everyday duties that the other things slowly recede to the background becoming less important to some.

I've been reading many other blogs and articles lately and am not really surprised at how many differing opinions there are on the subject. For some, cheating is the sexual escapades that take place outside the monogamist relationship, for others it can be as simple as the sharing of intimate emotions with someone of the opposite sex. My wife does not like the facts that I work so closely with an attractive younger woman, she knows nothing has happened between us physically (I'll save those dreams), but does not like the fact that when you spend ten to eleven hours a day with someone, you do tend to get close to them. Its not cheating in her eyes, but with that familiarity comes something else, that longing for something else...

For the few that do read my blog, I have never cheated physically, but I have cheated emotionally, I've become enamored with a kind of friendship I have never experienced before, I think about the path not taken and where it could lead. This is much of what brings those feelings of intimacy, passion, and excitement back to the surface of consciousness. It makes me want to do things I know are wrong from a societal standpoint, but this friendship has made me feel wanted in ways I've not felt in fifteen plus years. That forbidden fruit just being thrust out there in front in front of you, teasing you to taste.

This constant inner struggle has been going on for a few years now. It has its ups and downs. Things get more difficult when events at home get monotonous and attitudes rear their ugly heads. But I only say this because we are trying to work out our issues at home, I have not taken the path of less resistance, but I certainly think about it alot.

Does it make me a bad person to have lust in my heart? I don't care, its taken me 30 plus years to realize everyone is different, there is no mold to be forced into, but it is nice to know there are others out there going through the same gamut of emotions. I envy those of you who have found you passion.

You know its funny, I sit in traffic back and forth from work, about an hour each way, with all these thoughts banging around my head. I finally get a chance to sit down at the keyboard and put ink to paper, if you will, and ...nothing. Complete blank on what I wanted to put out there.

Anyway, its a day later and I did want to say something about a comment I received the other day, and believe me, it is much appreciated. It is nice to know there are others out there going through and feeling the same things as myself.
Reflecting on the situation with my coworker, I cant help but think what would happen if we did end up sleeping together. And I'm not talking about the fall out in my personal life, believe me I thought about that alot as well. I don't think my coworker could handle that kind of situation, I don't think she has the maturity level to deal with it. If I feel that the current work situation is difficult at times, I can't imagine what it would be like if this did happen. Would we be closer to each other mentally, certainly not physically, at work, or would it be more of an awkward working relationship where she would not know how to draw that line.

In my head, it all seems so easy and so hot, but reality is always a cruel mistress. I guess thats where it will have to stay, in my head, driving me crazy.

Snuff by Slipknot

I love this song's lyrics, its very powerful:

"Bury all you secrets in my skin, come away with innocence and leave me with my sins.
The air around me still feels like a cage, and love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage.

So if you love me let me go, and run away before I know.
My heart is just to tired to care, I can't destroy what isn't there.
Deliver me unto my fate, if I'm alone I cannot hate.
I don't deserve to have you.
My smile was taken long ago, if i can change don't ever let me know.

I still press you letters to my lips, and cherish them with parts of me that savor every kiss.
I couldn't face a life without you light, but all of that was ripped apart when you refused to fight.
So save your breath I will not hear, I think I've made it very clear.
You couldn't hate enough to love.
Is that supposed to be enough?
I only wish you weren't my friend, then I could hurt you in the end.
I never claimed to be a saint, my own was banished long ago, it took the death of hope to let you go.

So break yourself against my stones, and spit you pity in my soul.
You never needed any help,
You sold me out to save yourself.
And I won't listen to your shame, you ran away, your all the same.
Angels lie to keep control, my love was punished long ago, if you still care don't ever let me know."

"My hands are searching for you,my arms are outstretched for you.
I feel you on my finger tips, my tongue dances behind my lips for you.
Fire runs in through my being, burning I'm not used to seeing you.
I can feel you all around me, thickening the air I'm breathing,
holding on to all these feelings."